Five Totally Insane Ways To Break Up With A Guy
Sheesh – breaking up is hard to do. How do you break up with a guy without seeming evil? Well, the real way to break up with a guy is to sit down with him and talk to him about why you think it’s a bad idea to stay together. You also want to think about it before hand and come up with some really good arguments as to why a split is necessary. However, many college girls don’t take this route and they go from smart and reasonable to bat shit insane almost instantly.
Here are five totally insane ways to break up with a guy…
1. Leave a note using whip cream on his car. Okay, imagine it: he wakes up in the morning to go to school, he gets all his things together and walks outside to his car – only to realize that there is a giant note on the car telling him that he has been dumped; written with sticky whip cream. This method of breaking up is strongly advised against, but I guess it gets the message across.
2. Pretend that you never met him before. This is totally insane, but kind of funny. If you think about it, imagine somebody pretending that they don’t even know you, but they have actually been dating you for a few years and it is pretty serious. You’d feel like you are in an alternate universe. Again, this is a horrible way to break up with someone and it may just ruin someone’s life, so don’t do it.
3. Call your college online radio station and have them announce it – live on the air. This is another incredibly cruel way to break up with someone. You can think of it like the opposite of a public marriage proposal. All you have to do is get the DJ to announce it on the air, but you have to make sure that your boyfriend is actually listening. If he doesn’t listen to a college radio station regularly, it may not be worth it.
4. Take an ad out in the local paper. This is quite possibly the most insane and expensive ways to break up with a guy. With this crazy break up method, you need to have a few hundred dollars on hand – maybe even more money depending on how widely circulated the newspaper is. Plus, you have some options – you can get a half page or a full page. Of course, a full page will definitely be the most impactful.
5. A public break up at work. Does he work part time at an office? Does he deliver pizzas? Just show up to his work and tell him it is over. There is a good chance that he strongly dislikes his job. If he does, it is an even better place to break up with him, because he’ll hate it even more.
Lastly, I don’t recommend using any of these horribly cruel methods of breaking up with your boyfriend, but I have heard some rumors that some girls have used these methods. I can honestly say that you have to be a complete sociopath to go down those routes. The best way to break up with your boyfriend is obviously to be honest and mature. Don’t play games, because your heart might get broken too.
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